I’ll keep this safe, till you return - Voices of Women Media

My husband used to carry it all the time whenever he would go to rice field. It lay idle when he was disappeared and got rusted. I have been keeping it safely as his last memento.

I was taken to Bhairabnath Batallion on Dec 12, 2004. I was wearing this sweater when the army freed me and dropped me off at Banasthali Chowk on February 17, 2005. Swatantra Chaulagain of Bhote Chaur, Sindhupalchwok, had given me this sweater while we were in the army camp together. “Please register my name at Amnesty. Don’t quit the party if you return safely,” he had told me.

Swatantra Chaulagain is still missing.

My son used to recite this Bible at the church while going together with me. I have safely kept this Bible thinking he will return some day. When that happens I will hand it over to him.

My father used to make Buddha’s idols. Why is the army still keeping a man who likes making sculptures as hostage? Will this bring the peace to the country?

When my brother, Ajaya Shahi, earned his first salary he bought this shirt. My brother was disappeared by the Army on July 19, 2004. I have safely kept my brothers’ shirt in a separate box.

When I was young both my parents went to war. They wrote down stories from the torturous days they must have spent. They also wrote when they missed me. My grandmother cried a lot when she read the diary. So until today I haven’t had the courage to open this diary and read it. I have kept it unread hoping that when I get enough knowledge and strength to take forward my parents dreams this diary will be a source of my inspiration.